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#1 [en] 

There was a time when homins spoke the same language. Dappers and material resources were more abundant. Street drugs known as "cats" kept mostly everyone entertained. Life was simpler. And throughout it all there was a beacon of hope and light to warm our hearts, a bastion of truth to push away the darkness.

Of course I'm referring to the Eye of the Tyrancha News , the most disreputable, outrageous and aggravating news rag in all of Atys' history!

Dark times have crept up on our planet. The Kitins have swarmed again, destroying and killing. There is strife among homins... and we are loving every moment of it, for this is the stuff that tabloid news thrive on! The Eye of the Tyrancha News couldn't stay out of the fun any longer, so we're opening our doors once again to cover the news and spread the gossip on Atys!

The Zoraï were the first homins to develop the art of writing, and therefore it is only natural that our headquarters is located in the heart of the Witherings - the lovely town called Min-Cho. We use the finest materials the Bark has to offer (BQ q1 parchment) and our distribution system involves carefully trained izams that fly to the four corners of the world so that you can partake in the wisdom of Ma-Duk! Unbiased news, that's our motto.

You may remember the Eye of the Tyrancha News as the news rag that broke the story on the secret behind the Second Great Swarming. You heard it first from us! Well you only heard it from us, really.

So sit down, lean back, crack open a stinga beer or three and enjoy the ride!

Oracle of Min-Cho, Chief Editor

DISCLAIMER: No Izams were harmed in the making or distribution of this news rag………. no, really.

Edited 7 times | Last edited by Tearofserenity (5 years ago)

#2 [en] 

Did you ever wonder why there are no children or infants to be seen anywhere on Atys? What happened to the young ones?! The Eye of the Tyrancha News went in search of the truth, and what we unveiled is scandalous indeed. So without further ado, I give you:

ENTRY #1: JENA EATS BABIES!!!!

Yes, you read it right. Jena eats babies! And that's why there are no children anywhere. Here's evidence number one, illegally "borrowed" from Lilsis' amazing amber cube footage from the night of the stars:



In this image we see the remnants of a mysterious Karavan artifact that fell from the sky and crashed on the Lakelands. Of course homins were curious and wanted to take a look. What was the Karavan hiding? Could it be that they had a hidden stash of the now extinct experience catalysers and didn't want to share it with the uber guilds?

Unfortunaly the shady Karavan tech-heads showed up just in time to ruin the party and hide the truth.



So we have heard rumors that the Karavan came from beyond the stars. And now we see Karavan artifacts raining down from the sky - maybe from the upper branches, or perhaps even beyond?

These Karas clearly have a hidden agenda and they are not telling us everything! How can homins follow them when all they do is crawl in secrecy?!



In the image above, please observe the strange material of this Karavan vessel. It is unlike anything we normally see on Atys. It's not shell, nor amber, much less fiber! By digging through old chronicles and ancient history texts I came upon something that may shed some light into this issue. Immediately before the First Great Swarming, Fyros explorers had dug a little too deep into the roots and found a strange giant shield made of an unknown polished material. It was unlike anything they had ever seen, etched with strange runes. Right after that discovery, they kept going and stumbled upon the Kitins and the first swarming began. Well, guess what… that was another one of those profane Karavan artifacts, I tell you!

The Karavan had been hiding the Kitins in the depths of the Roots all along. Probably to use it as a weapon against the Kami. But maybe their "weapon" ran out of control and they had to shut the project down. No wonder the Karavan keeps telling us that homins are forbidden to go into the Deep Roots, using stories about dragons to scare us. What other secrets are they hiding in the bowels of Atys?!

And now Jena is stealing our babies and hiding them somewhere in the upper branches or the stars beyond. Probably to eat them, maybe to try to fuse them with kitins and create another kind of biological weapon to use against the Kami.

Some homins were able to salvage fragments of the Karavan artifact that crashed on the Lakelands and the word "megacorp", whatever that means, was one of the scarce few clues that could be gleaned from these alien fragments.

Well, we're watching you, Karavan! Your lies and secrets will not go unpunished much longer!

Edited 2 times | Last edited by Tearofserenity (5 years ago)

#3 [en] 

the eye is back?!?!?
this is a glorious day for atys. so long has the truth been quiet. so quiet have the years been. so much drama left unreported.
 

---


marceline nitwit.
professional procrastinator.
atys's first openly transgender homina.
loyal member of the guardians of subox.
founding member of the cookies.
proud honorary member of the Lost Girls.

Douglas (atys)
“What to do if you find yourself stuck in a crack in the ground underneath a giant boulder you can't move, with no hope of rescue. Consider how lucky you are that life has been good to you so far. Alternatively, if life hasn't been good to you so far, which given your current circumstances seems more likely, consider how lucky you are that it won't be troubling you much longer.”
What Cookies is about ---- Contact Cookies ---- Cookies at Events ---- For Cookies Diggers and Crafters

#4 [en] 

The Truth? sounds like this newspaper is already biased, Is there no hearing the other side of the story, maybe the Kami are evil and telling lies about the Karavan. :(

#5 [en] 

This is indeed wonderful - news that we can rely on!

---

Binarabi
This idea of "I'm offended". Well I've got news for you. I'm offended by a lot of things too. Where do I send my list? Life is offensive. You know what I mean? Just get in touch with your outer adult. (Bill Hicks)

#6 [en] 

smut is always a top seller no matter what.

---

Remickla (atys)
Other games - they give you a cookie whether you succeed or not, in fact you don't even have to participate. Ryzom takes your cookie, eats it in front of you, and slaps you 2 or 3 times for bringing a cookie in the first place.
What Cookies is about ---- Contact Cookies ---- Cookies at Events ---- For Cookies Diggers and Crafters
Useful Links:
cookies approved referance data, guides, and more. --- ryztools web version --- talkIRC forum post table of contents

#7 [en] 

gimme bias smut over truth any day... a morning brew tastes far better when accompanied by some satire.

---


marceline nitwit.
professional procrastinator.
atys's first openly transgender homina.
loyal member of the guardians of subox.
founding member of the cookies.
proud honorary member of the Lost Girls.

Douglas (atys)
“What to do if you find yourself stuck in a crack in the ground underneath a giant boulder you can't move, with no hope of rescue. Consider how lucky you are that life has been good to you so far. Alternatively, if life hasn't been good to you so far, which given your current circumstances seems more likely, consider how lucky you are that it won't be troubling you much longer.”
What Cookies is about ---- Contact Cookies ---- Cookies at Events ---- For Cookies Diggers and Crafters

#8 [en] 

and don't forget the biscuits (cookies). lolx

---

Remickla (atys)
Other games - they give you a cookie whether you succeed or not, in fact you don't even have to participate. Ryzom takes your cookie, eats it in front of you, and slaps you 2 or 3 times for bringing a cookie in the first place.
What Cookies is about ---- Contact Cookies ---- Cookies at Events ---- For Cookies Diggers and Crafters
Useful Links:
cookies approved referance data, guides, and more. --- ryztools web version --- talkIRC forum post table of contents

#9 [en] 

Dear readers,

Thank you so much for your kind words and feedback. You can always rely on us, Binarabi!

The Eye is certainly unbiased! We just cover the truth. The Karavan is evil, the Kami are good and the enlightened Zorai should be presiding over the spiritual well being of the other homins. We just follow the facts and write them down.

Marceline, you're a talented writer. You should consider writing for the Eye.

Eye of the Tyrancha News, producing the most outrageously delicious smut on the living planet.

Oracle of Min-Cho, Chief Editor

#10 [en] 

ENTRY #2: RAWR!

It seems like the exodus after the second great swarming has changed Atysian culture on many different levels. Homins were forced to live separately from each other for many years, and these different communities have developed distinct dialects and philosophies.

Some communities prefer muscular Matis men wearing Fyros medium armor. Others scoff at the pale skin and consider Zorai women in light jungle armor the new sexy. Tastes vary, opinions clash.




One such clash of philosophies comes in the form of the age old Faction War. On one side we have extremists who want nothing but the absolute obliteration of the opposing factions. If you're Kami for example, you should not socialize with Karavaneers, trade with them or even heal one in times of need. In fact, you should poke him with sharp objects, call him a "son of a varynx" and steal his yubo teddy.



On the other side we have the moderates. And I'm not even talking about neutrals that do not take sides here. I'm talking about Kamists and Karavaneers who will fight to defend Outposts in the name of their faction but still maintain communication channels open with the opposing factions, which include trade truces and sometimes even friendships or scandalous forbidden romances. These homins believe in hugging, cuddling and swinger parties.



Now one thing extremists seem to forget is that there is a big difference between Kamis and Kamists, and between the Karavan and Karavaneers. Kamis and the Karavan are the self-procclaimed divine entities that fight over control of Atys. Kamis are furry, speak funny and act on the behalf of Ma-Duk. The Karavan are the champions of Jena, hide their faces with silly masks and fly around in strange vessels.

Kamists and Karavaneers are simply the homins who pick one side of the battle. Once, a long time ago, the Fyros followed Jena. But then they took a step towards spiritual enlightenment and decide to embrace Ma-Duk, becoming Kamists. Good for them.

As a Kamist and a follower of Ma-Duk, it is my duty to guide other homins towards spiritual enlightenment, to free them from the shackles of the shady Karavan. To take over the planet in the name of Ma-Duk. That involves not only fighting the Karavan (as in the weird masked tech-heads and their flying vessels) but also converting the misguided homins from other factions. That does not involve the complete genocide of all Matis and Trykers.

Well ok, maybe the genocide of all Trykers is alright. There's just something creepy about how many times a day they bathe. But you get the picture!



If you're a Kami and you stop to heal a Karavaneer in need, or you go hunting with him while preaching about the blessings of Kamihood, maybe one day he will join the Will of Ma-Duk. One less Karavaneer to fight and one more Kamist to defend the planet. If you go about dragging kinchers onto any Karavaneer you see, you only breed hatred and then that Karavaneer's sons and grandsons will pick up Jena's banner to avenge their poor mom inside some kitin's belly. It is a vicious cycle.



The moderates should also think carefully about their philosophy, of course. If you're too lax in your ways, you might end up strengthening the opposing faction in unexpected ways and the Karavan will keep on exploiting the natural resources of Atys in all the wrong ways. So I'm not saying Kamists should go about handing out weapons of mass destruction to the enemy. It's a delicate balance here.

So maybe hug with one arm and poke with another? And spread the word of Ma-Duk throughout. As for the swinger parties, those should continue. That's a no brainer.



( OOC / HRP: Special thanks to Talkirc and Rosina for making this article possble! )

Edited 3 times | Last edited by Tearofserenity (5 years ago)

#11 [en] 

One can only applaud the unbiased, throroughly researched opinions of the Eye.

Thank you!

---

#12 [en] 

ENTRY #3: The Neutral Path


As Kamists, Karavanists and Marauders alike continue to slash, stab, poke and blast each other to pieces in Outposts and the Prime Roots, the faction wars seem to have no end in sight. Our foolhardy war reporters from the Eye of the Tyrancha News have gone to the front line in order to document these gruesome images. But please be advised that the image below is not recommended for children or those of delicate constitution:



And yet, there are those homins who refuse to take part in the bloodshed. They believe in a different Atys, they fight for world peace, friendship among homins and much snuggling for all - they are the neutral homins of Atys!



The Eye went out of its way to contact and interview three of the most known and respected neutral guilds of Atys. Well, one of them is a special case, but we'll get to that soon.

First and foremost, we have Phaedreas Tears, which is to our knowledge the oldest surviving true neutral guild of Atys!


Image of the famous Phaedreas Tears weekly trek passing through Loria.


According to Bitttymacod, renowned scholar and member of Phaedreas Tears, all civilizations have valid ideals. The problem is when that one particular set of beliefs is considered to be the only valid and acceptable way. Bitttymacod tells us Phaedreas Tears embraces the best of all civilizations and its members work together to advance skills and help other homins regardless of creed.

Next in line, we have Spirit of Arlevinda, another true neutral guild that branched out of Phaedreas Tears to tackle the challenges of Atys from a slightly different perspective. The guild's name is inspired by the beautiful story of Arlevinda, a legendary huntress who chose to ignore her master's request to slay the Blue Ocyx and befriended the beast instead. We interviewed Songbird, Ranger Aspirant and member of Spirit of Arlevinda. Songbird says that the guild's ultimate goal is to become a fully-fledged Ranger guild and protect Atys.

The Rangers have become quite active in Atys since the Second Great Swarming, recruiting and training homins to fight the Kitin menace. It would be hard to find a group of homins as popular as these green-clad kitin hunters. They love all races, civilizations, religions and factions. But Songbird explains that it would be wrong to assume Ranger life is easy.

Even though the Rangers have been exploring ancient paths to be able to travel more efficiently throughout Atys, they still do not have access to the Prime Roots and their rites are long and arduous to undertake. You may look fabulous in that olive green armor, shaking hands with Kamists and Karavanists alike, but fighting angry Kirostas ain't no piece of cake!



And finally we have our "special case" guild, the Guardians of Shadows. The Guardians is the only guild to openly declare themselves Trytonists. They are based in the Lakelands, they cherish democracy, and according to Astarth they are a tolerant and independent bunch. Oh, and they are liberal. Very liberal. "We accept transgender marauders" in our midst type of liberal.


Exclusive image of a secret Trytonist party in Fairhaven.


Astarth explains that the Guardians of Shadows have been trytonists for a while now. They had plans to turn Min-Cho into a trytonist enclave, but ran into opposition from the Kami forces who thought they wanted to bring marauders into the Witherings. After that they decided to publicly declare their allegiance to Elias Tryton, for they no longer fear the age long persecution against the Guild of Elias.

The Trytonists are pro-civilization and love all homins equally, but they are fiercely opposed to organized religions and factions, such as the Kami and the Karavan. They believe in keeping the balance of the faction wars and have been known to aid whichever side is losing at the moment.

Finally, while not a guild in itself, we also have a coalition of like minded homins led by Chanchey who take it upon themselves to unite forces in the struggle against the Marauders. These homins choose to ignore civilization and faction allegiances in order to oppose a common threat. Kamists, Karavanists and Neutrals alike join forces weekly to fight infamous Marauders such as Aen, Pei, Lixi and Sergio.

So if you're tired of faction war drama and bloodshed, remember these brave homins who chose the path of neutrality. Instead of killing other homins, why not fight the Kitins? Just be careful with Kincher bites!

Last edited by Tearofserenity (4 years ago)

#13 [en] 

ENTRY #4: Merry Atysmas! (in 3 different dialects)


A Kara, a Kami and a Marauder walk into a bar together and ask for a round of shooki beer. The barman looks at them and aks, "What is this - some kind of joke?"

And so it is that while Kamis and Karas drinking together may seem like a joke to some, the spirit of Atysmas is filling the hearts of many homins with joy and warmth. Here we can see how homins and kinchers alike came together to share stories and drinks by the campfire:



And while Atysmas events unfold across Atys, a groundbreaking revelation has shocked homins everywhere. Ever since the Second Great Swarming, there have been several complaints about conflicting memories and no one understood very well how homins began to speak different dialects after only a few years in refuge.

The various governments were befuddled by the situation. Some homins remember the Matis attacking and burning Thesos, while others swore that event never happened and was avoided by diplomacy. Nation leaders were thought to be either alive or dead, depending on whom you asked. Confusion abounded.

No one understood what was happening, until the Karavan decided to intervene and provide an explanation to us all. According to them, there exists something called "parallel universes". These are like stains of different colors flowing in the grand river of time. In each one of these stains or parallel universes, homins spoke a different dialect and the same events happened in slightly different ways.



If you think the karavan scientists have been smoking too much cratcha buds, that's probably because they have! The story gets stranger yet. Apparently we can blame none other than Elias Tryton for causing three of these parallel universes to crash into each other, merge and create this mess that we see today.

As the story goes, the sassy Elias Tryton is resposible for seducing Jena and winning her heart, only to get bored and dump her soon afterwards. But Jena is not a techno goddess to be trifled with. She sent the Karavan to chase after Elias and the goody two-shoes was forced to go into hiding. And that was that.

Except that Elias must have stolen some sort of information about Karavan teleportation on his way out, because his rainbow portals apparently attempt to mimic Kami and Karavan teleportation but fall short. The rainbow portals are not as sophisticated as Karavan teleportation, they do not have the same insight into the workings of the universe or some such. And it was the excessive use of Tryton's flawed portals at the end of the second great swarming and the exodus that caused a huge energy malfunction of some kind on the various parallel Atys, sending them all down the drain to merge together into this one lovely and friendly Atys we now know. Grats, Elias!



And here we are now. Celebrating one more Atysmas as single, lovely living planet!

Enjoy your baked yubo dinner and merry Atysmas!

#14 [en] 

ENTRY #5: Who let the Kitins out?!


My grandma always used to say: "do not poke a kitin nest with a short stick".

She also used to say: "curiosity killed the yubo".

I do not think the Matis have any grandmas. Maybe they just spawn out of the Abyss of Ichor.

And so it was that Matis Ambassador Ozwomen let her curiosity get the best of her and organized a number of expeditions to the Kitin nest known as Tunnel of Woe in the Verdant Heights. The last one was attended by a great number of homins. Many spells were cast. Kitins were poked multiple times. That made them mad, very mad. And they swarmed.



The Kitins swarmed in massive numbers and headed south directly towards Yrkanis, the Matis capital. It seemed like everything was going to end well, with the Kitins destroying the Matis once and for all, but unfortunaly their attack was very disorganized and uncoordinated. The Kitin hunters were able to teleport to Yrkanis quickly and fend off the threat without much effort.

Once Yrkanis was safe, the brave homins went back to the Tunnel of Woe and began to fight the Kitins in their home turf. The battle was fierce.



That was when a Kizarak queen emerged from the nest and joined the fray. The coallition of homins was able to defeat the matriarch in the end, but the Kitins are still swarming in the Tunnel of Woe and Knoll of Dissent. It seems like this is not over yet. Perhaps only the Rangers can save us now. If they can just find all their pathways first…

Last edited by Tearofserenity (4 years ago)

#15 [en] 

Dear readers,

We regret to inform you that due to unforeseen technical difficulties, the Eye of the Tyrancha News must cease its operations temporarily.

Mata yumé,

Reporter

---

(o) Eye of the Tyrancha News (o)

Eye of the Tyrancha News, Volume 1

Eye of the Tyrancha News, Volume 2

Special Edition: Kamist Manifesto

Special Edition: The Secret Behind the Second Great Swarming
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