Marelli
This is something I also see disturbingly much amongst RPers; as soon as the story doesn't go exactly as they want, they break out of character and accuse the other of being a bad RPer.
You have hit the nail on the head for a quite a few "roleplayers" in Ryzom with this. However, I believe that the dedicated roleplayers will continue their RP and withdraw themselves from the interactions with these types of characters. In my experience, those who are serious about roleplay stay in character and welcome opportunities to expand their character. I personally have roleplayed, at all various levels, for years and can never say that my RPing experience has ever been ruined by anyone that remains in their roleplaying character.
As far as RP griefing, the few times I have experienced what I would consider RP griefing, I have found it to be OOC and consists of inappropriate dialog to the specific roleplay event and many times are brought to channels not normally used for roleplay (in Ryzom this would be Universe - all the time, and Regional - majority of the time). This can include name calling, badgering, belittling, etc. However, only if the harrassment got obessive would I even consider reporting these types of incidents - I am a big girl, sticks and stones, turn the other cheek, etc. - since 99% of the time the other person's griefing attempts are not worth the acknowledgement nor the expenditure of energy.
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Peace, Luv & Cookies,Inifuss