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Eye of the Tyrancha News, Volume 2

Volume 2, Issue 06: A Bad Hair Day

As reported on our previous issue, the Matis Nobles prepared a diplomatic gift of aromatic flowers for the new Zoraï Awakened of the Witherings as a gesture of peace between both governments. Yrkanis’s Assistant Botanist, lovingly nicknamed AssBot by her peers, was in charge of the collection and storage of the flowers. Maybe the last time she picked up the wrong potion and nearly caused mutant Cratchas to destroy Yrkanis was not totally forgotten by the Matis, but who knows.

However this time AssBot did her job well, and all went according to the plan. In this time and age even the Matisian Monarchy is working with third party companies to minimize costs and maximize results. This is Atysian globalization for you as teleport tickets and amber cubes become the norm. As such, the Nobles hired a company specialized in the transport of goods to coordinate the delivery caravan for them.

In comes the stylish trio hired by the Nobles to handle the job:

From left to right:
Villi Frebi, with hair smooth as silk and a packer full of hair products. He couldn’t seem to find his map though.
Bezzo Rosi, party guy extraordinaire. He couldn’t wait for the welcoming party at the end.
And finally Cigno Zazzo, the leader of the group and the girl who really wore the pants.

A large group of volunteers appeared to escort and guard the caravan through the perilous mazes of the forest, the mind numbing swimming of the lakelands and the dangerous journey through the Prime Roots. It was a light hearted and exciting trek – Villi Frebi was terribly worried the wind or the water would ruin his carefully sculpted haircut, but beauty queen Rahia gave him some insights on how to use irin oil to avoid that bad hair day.

It seems like some flowers rotted along the way though, and the not so fragrant smell attracted all manner of predators, kitins and other nasties, which had to be fought off by the caravan guards.

Or at least that’s the official story. But the Eye of Tyrancha News and its daring investigative reporters are always on the lookout for the hidden truth behind the official story. Who was the mysterious Yene, a Matis grumpier than even Jayce, who appeared to be opposed to the goals of the caravan and did not hesitate to mock the Zoraï and their ways? Was it really rotting flowers that attracted the hordes of predators? Or is there more to it? Villi Frebi did leave a trail of discarded hair products in his wake… but hey, at least his hair did look fabulous throughout the whole trip.

Despite the many mysteries, the fragrant caravan arrived safely at the Jen Laï Research Center, where the Nobles presented the Awakened with their fragrant gift - minus the rotten flowers. Much merrymaking and celebration ensued. Perhaps a tad too much merrymaking. Aeralin, representative of the Zoraï Awakened, distributed medkits to the wounded guards, who then proceeded to quench their thirst with various drinks. Not a very good combination by any means.

Everyone survived though, including all the packers transporting the goods. And the Matis-Zoraï relationship has never been better.

Finally, we would like to inform our dear readers that the Eye of the Tyrancha News will be closed for a month or so. Our staff of enlightened Zoraï Initiates will embark on a spiritual pilgrimage to a paradisiacal island in Liberty Lakes to contemplate the meaning of life with exotic tropical drinks and scantily dressed trykerettes. Farewell and see you soon!


"We are Kami. We are here to be you. We are many as you are of many minds. We are one as you are one in Ma-Duk."
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